That’s life

BD • February 20, 2020

When you’re in your teens you think you know what you want and struggle to figure out how you’re going to get it. I want to be a singer, but I don’t have the courage to move to a place like Nashville or New York. I want to get a degree, but I don’t know how to pay for it. etc. etc.

When you’re in your twenties you’re pretty sure about your path, but you know you’ve got forever to change your mind. I’ll go to school then start working or I’ll start a family or travel. I’m young, I can do anything.

In your thirties, you realize you’re a grown-up and you probably better get on with it, whether it is a career, children, travel, whatever. OMG, you’re thirty! You’re not getting any younger and your internal clock is ticking.

The forties, it’s official, you’re an adult, you have a career that you may or may not have chosen. You have children who need you, but you have to pay the bills, and they are probably old enough to get by on their own sometimes. But wait, your parents are aging. What the heck? When did that happen?

The fifties is great, you’re no longer the youngster in the office, you know how things work and you’re at the top of your game. You’re making a decent wage after twenty years of working and you have grown kids that will bring you grandchildren. What a lovely gift. Spoil them and send them home. That rocks!

In your sixties, if you are lucky, healthy and have been saving all this time you’ll retire. If not, here’s hoping you can actually find a job you enjoy instead of the day-to-day grind. You’re too old for that shit. Then you realize that while you were living, retiring and finally have some time to do what you want to do – your parents get sick and pass away. Often it doesn’t happen quickly, so you delve into your memories and fear of mortality and watch them shrink. The ones who cared for you are now under your care. It feels weird, but it’s okay. You love them and you do everything you can to make them comfortable and safe.

All around you people are dying. Their bodies are wearing out, their minds are too full to hold the events of today. Sometimes it’s a slow death, sometimes it’s quick, but whatever it may be, death hurts. No matter how good or bad the relationship, you miss them. So, I’m searching in my databanks for all of the good memories I can find. That’s what I want to hold on to, not the withering, not the failing, not the dying. And when all memory has faded, I hope it goes to black in peace and silence.

By Bonnie D Tharp February 11, 2026
We don't do much for Valentine's Day around here. When you've been married as long as we have (half a century) it isn't as exciting as when your relationship is new. I am a fan of hearts and silly cards, however. I used to get very creative for the holiday, like the time I sent a bouquet of "long stemmed noses" to hubby at work. (I'm talking about Groucho Marks nose glasses complete with the mustache.) That was rather a good time and the "noses" came in handy for Halloween. The year I bought a bag of new potatoes and delivered them to the florist to create a bouquet of "Long Stemmed Spuds" was fun, too. Although I think it embarrassed him a bit. Willie the wild-man has now decided that my husband's bar of soap (which smells like bourbon) is tasty. He keeps stealing it from the bathroom sink and chewing on it on my bed/quilt. Sigh. It's always something with this little guy. The soap does smell wonderful, Duke Cannon is the brand. They also make a Pine scent that works nicely, too. Willie, however, recommends the bourbon fragrance. Good grief. WHAT ARE YOU READING? I received a wonderful book on Beatrix Potter (Beatrix Potter: A Life in Nature) for Christmas. It's quite lengthy, with dense writing, so I'm taking my time. I have to, but it is compelling. The woman was amazing, not only an artist and author, but a scientist, naturalist, conservationist, and so much more. During Victorian times women didn't receive the attention or accolades they deserved until much later. Sad but true. There are many women who achieved amazing discoveries and never made it into the history books. At any rate, I admire strong, smart women who don't give up. Beatrix Potter was one of them. To answer your question: Yes, all of my books are in the local library. You can request a copy for your local library or donate one after you read it. I also keep copies of my last two books (FROM THE DARKNESS & FROM THE GLOOM) at Watermark Books & Cafe - One of my FAVORITE independent bookstores! If you're not a local reader then you can obtain my print books at Amazon.com, and ebooks at Amazon.com & BN.com.
By Bonnie D Tharp January 26, 2026
Although I love writing books, reading books, and talking books, none of it would be worthwhile without READERS. You are the true rockstars! When you find a story you enjoy, you tell your family and friends, you buy them for same, you write reviews and sometimes share your thoughts with the author. Discussing stories is a wonderful way to get to know people, and find new story ideas. Just ask members of my book club. They've shared personal stories and wonderful ideas with me and I've shared parts of them with you in my books. FALL is always my favorite time of year. As it gets to be "sweater weather" I love to walk and admire the brilliance of nature. In autumn I visited New England to see my family and the trees were gorgeous. I had a great vacation, picking apples, playing corn hole, attending local theater, shopping at the coolest garden store, and eating - of course. If you're ever in Massachusetts, visit Russell's Garden Center. It's huge, it has beautiful flowers and plants, stationary, art, and clothing, too. Spending is easy there because they have so many wonderful things. Believe me, I did my share. BOOK NEWS: All three in the feisty family series is now on audio, so you can listen to FEISTY FAMILY VALUES, PATCHWORK FAMILY, OR FEISTY FAMILY & FRIENDS while you do other things, like walking, gardening, cleaning. It makes them more enjoyable. CURRENT PROJECT UPDATE: The first reader for my current historical novel in progress sent me a text - she's "loving it and hooked by the end of chapter one." That's pretty good for a first draft, so once it's edited... That's where you mine the jewels, folks, during the editing process. Edit IS a four letter word, but it's vital. That doesn't mean no errors will be found, because something always slips through the cracks (even with the big publishing houses), but it's not because we authors don't try to make them errorless. After multiple editor reviews and a minimum of six to eight author read throughs you get pretty close. Hopefully.
By Bonnie D Tharp January 19, 2026
Updates on my work in progress Here's a photo of the Watermelon Boys. We believe that the boys are Grandpa, an Uncle, and a cousin in my husband's family back in the day. I love this shot! New technology is challenging, more so than ever. It changes so quickly my head spins. I may need to hire a teenager to help me weed through the morass. My grandson used to be that teenager, but he's on to bigger and better things. Lucky dude! When our internet provider decided to farm out email I lost my contacts and the book fan group I had developed. So, I am starting from scratch. If you know someone who might enjoy this stuff, send them to my website to sign up for my newsletter. The more the merrier. Those of you that stuck with me are rockstars, every one of you! Now for the news updates. The latest Rachel McGill mystery FROM THE GLOOM (#4) is now available at Watermark Books. They also have a couple of copies of (#3), From the Darkness. I'm happy to say that all eight of my novels are now available at the Wichita Public Library, and can be purchased at Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, Kobo and some are available on Apple Books. I started writing a historical fiction story in 2008 that is inspired by my husband's great grandmother. She was gone when I joined the family fifty years ago, but the stories about her are incredible. She homesteaded in Oklahoma in 1893 (alone), she taught school, she ran a store, she painted with oils, and her photography was amazing (i.e. a double exposure so she could have tea with herself). Needless to say, I am awed by her courage, talent, and creativity. The working title for the historical is FINDING GRACE. The main character is in her early twenties. When her father arranges for her to marry the local banker's son (who her younger sister is in love with), Grace decides to make her own way, elsewhere. There are interesting research materials available that have given me insight into the 1890's and pioneering in the midwest. I hope to capture the time and place, and create an interesting character you will care about. If you're interested in the topic I can recommend: Frontier Women by Julie Roy Jeffrey, Westering Women and the Frontier Experience 1800-1915 by Sandra L. Myres, The Cherokee Strip by Marquis James, Pioneer Women: Voices from the Kansas Frontier by Joanna L. Stratton. I'm sure there are many more but these are the ones I am using. Photographs from the land rush are fascinating and available at the Cherokee Strip Land Rush Museum, and on the internet. It's a lot more fun writing and not working a day job. Two-thousand-eight was not a very good year. I was working for a technology company and the tech bubble burst, but we survived. And now I have time to write. Win.
By Bonnie D Tharp November 11, 2025
We had Covid in October through the beginning of November. It was no fun. I did a lot of sleeping and reading (when I wasn't coughing or blowing my nose). I finished The Woman in the Library, Song of the Bones (Preston), Ice Queen (Hoffman), and Sandstorm (Rollins). I enjoyed them all, but brain fog made some of it challenging (Woman in the Library) . Making my way through the fog kept my brain working, and wore me out at the same time. Naps were a must. Television made my head hurt more. Covid is gone now and I am so glad! Reading kept me going. And I haven't missed television all that much. I'm busy writing a historical novel set in the Cherokee Strip land rush in the 1890's. We'll start the holiday planning soon and that should liven things up a bit. What do you bet there will be more books? No doubt.
By Bonnie D Tharp November 11, 2025
As always, Kristin Hannah doesn't disappoint. Her novel about the women in the Viet Nam war is incredible. I cried, I laughed, I got mad, I was touched. If I could give more than five stars I would. I remember the war. As a high school kid it was real through news clips, protests, and soldiers dying. But we were removed, somehow. This book brought it all home for me. Frankie McGrath became a nurse to help soldiers like her brother. She wanted to do her part for her country and make her parents proud. She had no idea what she had gotten herself into until she walked into the mobile OR. Reality bites viciously. So much happened over the course of this book I am afraid of giving anything away. Read it and you'll experience what Frankie and other women like her experienced. https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/296872-bonnie-tharp
By Bonnie D Tharp July 25, 2024
There aren't any palm trees in the Midwest, nor beaches with rolling surf, but we have some lakes. Unfortunately, many are drying up due to the drought we're experiencing, which is frightening. Global warming is real, people. Instead of puttering outside, I've been inside reading and painting. Did you know I was a painter? It's been fun to reacquaint myself with art, color, light, and the quiet concentration of creating something on canvas. Portraits appeal the most, trying to capture the spark in the eyes of a mischievous child (or adult as the case may be). I've also experimented with night scenes, animals, and I'm painting my first seascape (thanks to some wonderful photography by my good friend, Nathan Hill). When I retired a few years ago I decided it was time to finish some projects that I had started decades before. A wonderful retired art teacher was introduced and she helped me get back into the craft of seeing light and color. It's been great fun, and challenging, too. I'm happy to say I've finished several paintings and I'm proud of them. It's never too late to create.
By Bonnie D Tharp April 27, 2024
I thought when I retired I'd be bored. Well, that hasn't happened. I'm busier now than I was when I worked. Who knew? I'm sitting in my home office waiting on the rain. It's a beautiful cloudy Saturday. Storms are predicted for later, and we need the rain so badly. My dog doesn't like storms much. He used to be so brave, but nearly being struck by lightning made a permanent impression on him and fear took it's place. Poor fellow. The neighbors have their little ones out in the cul-de-sac riding their respective fisher price vehicles, while they can. I need to get my four legged buddy out for a quick walk as well. Soon. Very soon. By now you've heard that my seventh book has been published, FROM THE DARKNESS. It's exciting and the reviews are good ones. I think it's the best one yet. If you like a mystery with heart, I hope you'll give it a read. The second book in the feisty series, PATCHWORK FAMILY, is being narrated into an audio book as we speak. I'm not sure when, but that's the plan. FEISTY FAMILY & FRIENDS is already in audio book. We love to listen to books when we're driving, but it's also great for mundane chore completion, making it so much more fun. There's a painting I've been requested to paint, two actually. I'll probably get it done in a month or so then the oil paint needs to cure before it can be handled. It's more intricate than anything I've done so far, and will challenge me. The key is taking the time needed, no rushing a difficult creation. Painting a picture is very similar to writing a book. You sketch out the idea, then build on it. Sounds simple but every step requires concentration, an open mind, and patience. Creating is time consuming, whether it's a book, a painting, a garden, a sculpture, or a healthy body. The trick is to stick with it, even when it becomes difficult. The results will be worth it. Enjoy the journey, my friends.
By Bonnie D Tharp December 31, 2023
Our ancestors passed down stories to educate and entertain. Stories make the world go around. Writing is difficult and I work very hard to tell a good story. I've been writing for publication for twenty-four years and it's been a wild ride. Joy, frustration, excitement, disappointment, rejection, acceptance, good reviews and bad, tears and fear. Having delved into a new genre a few years ago, romantic suspense, I realize that the really gritty stuff isn't my thing. I don't like wallowing in the muck, the blood, and the despair. Strong women characters and flawed but kind male characters move me. After recently submitting one of my books to a contest the review made me realize just how true these things are. I like a satisfying ending. Life rambles and so do the characters and plots of my books. Keeping in mind not everyone will like every novel, the judge made me feel like a novice and that broke my heart. I've never been a literary writer, although I admire the prose of many successful literary authors. They ROCK! But it's not who I am or what I write. I apologize to any of my readers who have been disappointed in my books. My heart felt thanks go to all those readers who enjoy my novels, have left a review, and tell others you think might also enjoy them. You are rock stars, every one of you! Bless you all in the new year, may it be filled with hope, good health, and joy!
By Bonnie D Tharp November 21, 2023
Blessings and good wishes to all my readers. If you've enjoyed my books, please let people know - writing reviews on Goodreads, Amazon.com, BN.com, Audible, Facebook, Instagram, etc. Share the love. I'm nearing the end of the first draft of FROM THE DARKNESS, another Rachel McGill romantic suspense novel. This time the stakes are even higher, there is reason to believe her parents were murdered before the house burned to the ground. But who did it and why? It should be edited and published by spring, I hope. Stay tuned!
By Bonnie D Tharp March 24, 2023
Hoffman brings the St. Thomas island community to life. Our main characters are Jews who have escaped to St. Thomas from Spain and Portugal in the 1800s. Rachel and her best friend, Jestine whose mother is the African cook for the Pomie family, roam the island at will.